Is baking only a women’s forte?  Because whenever I tell people that my brother bakes pineapple tarts, they’ll express astonishment or disbelief.

Like over the weekend when I went for a haircut, one of the girls at the salon had asked me if I wanted to buy pineapple tarts that she has baked.  I told her no, because my brother has already baked some for me.  And her reactions were as expected. 

“Huh?  Your brother?  Why is a man baking these???” 

And why not?  My brother has always love arts, crafts and cooking.  In fact, he’s the who taught me how to draw and paint, and he’s the only one who expresses interest in my mum’s recipes.  Come to think of it, maybe he could have more opportunities to excel in these areas if he were born a female.

Well, I know.  It’s a gender stereotype.  People appear odd when they don’t fit into the standard pigeonhole even though what they’re doing could be absolutely normal.  And much as I like to think that I’m open-minded, I sometimes succumb to these trappings in weak moments too.  Blame it on human nature lah. 

Anyway, my brother makes excellent yu sheng salad too and I’m looking forward to having it next week! 

I’m in a dilemma. 

I’m supposed to teach my best friend how to blog about her handmade jewelry today but how do I teach her without showing her my blogs?  Especially since I will be helping to promote her stuff later.

She knows I blog but she doesn’t know the address and I’m not very keen for her to read what I write here.   I’m perfectly fine opening up to strangers, but having people I know read my thoughts is another thing.  Actually she knows a lot more about me than what I share here but it’s just that I’m not comfortable with her reading what I write.  Yeah, I’m just being quirky.

All my blogs are interlinked.  She will find her way here once I point her to one.  And I’m not about to remove those links either.

So what should I do?  She will ask for sure.

Apart from the boy’s birthday, we’ve never actually ordered any of our birthday cakes in advance.  So we always end up going to the same shop and getting the same cake, only asking for different number of candles.

Customisation is not important.  Size is not important either.  But it has to be a black forest cake because we don’t eat any other flavours and I don’t care for a change. 

Anyway, I’ve not been excited about my birthdays especially since it spells another year older for me.  And to be honest, neither am I that excited about the man’s birthday.  Well, how to get excited when it’s the only time I get reminded of the fact that he’s still younger than me when I ask for the candles?

*squints eyes and sticks out tongue at man*

Everytime I meet my hairstylist, he’s always lamenting about how he’s unable to take too much time off or he’ll be losing his clients.  And he never fails to add that it’s because he’s the sole provider in the family.  Though he’s not exactly complaining, but I know he’s under a lot of pressure.

His is not the only story that I hear. 

Another friend, a high flyer may I add, also says about the same thing.  As a matter of fact, this friend of mine actually complains while boasting at the same time, saying things like, “What to do?  My wife isn’t working.” 

I’m pretty sure there was communication prior to decisions being made for the family to go on a single income.  So my question is, do the husbands really mean it when they say they’re okay with the wives not working and becoming a SAHM? 

Perhaps due to ego especially fueled by the long standing expections that men are to provide for the family, I know of some who do not reflect their genuine thoughts even to their spouse.  They may say they do not mind, they’re supportive, yadda yadda, but then think or say something else altogether behind backs.  Otherwise, why are these men that I know personally lamenting?   They could have said those things in jest to me, but then again, I think those thoughts are latent within their subconscious.  

I certainly prefer men who are more upfront with their feelings.  Like my best friend’s husband, who even though was doing well years ago, clearly told his wife then that he rather not have her become a SAHM so soon.  As for us, this was never quite an issue since I’ve always wanted to do something for myself long-term despite whatever circumstances we’re in.

The SAHMs reading this may think that I’m stirring shit here but that’s not my intention.  Neither am I trying to say that women should be working and not becoming SAHMs.  I respect that this is a family decision and a personal choice.  

It’s just an open thought I have on a relationship topic. Sure some women can even go round telling the world that their husbands can provide well for them, but that still doesn’t take away the fact that the men could be under a whole lot of pressure just providing those comforts.  Whatever the situation, the question here is, does he really express what he thinks when making that joint decision?

When I watch Japanese dramas or movies, I like to watch it in their native language even though it means I have to read the Chinese subtitles.  Sometimes, I have to watch a part several times in order to understand what the characters were trying to convey.  But still, it definitely beats the dubbed version, especially since the dubbed voices usually sucks.  (I only want to listen to Takuaya’s sexy voice!)

Of course I wish I can understand Japanese but heck, it’s difficult.   According to this Japanese language site I visited, the language order in Japanese is usually subject-object-verb instead of the subject-verb-object in English langague.  There’s even differences in male speech and female speech, and the vocabulary is also too confusing.

For example, “I love you” can be literally translated as “aishite imasu （愛しています）”. “Aishiteru （愛してる）,” “aishiteru yo （愛してるよ）” or “aishiteru wa (愛してるわ, female speech)”. And learning to write Hiragana and Katakana is no joke!

But I do wish I know how to read in Japanese.  At least then I don’t have such a hard time trying to figure out certain instructions on their gadgets or their costmetics.  And most importantly, I can read the thoughts of my Takuya Kimura instead of just drooling over his pix!