I was up since 5.30am this morning. Gavin was having difficulty sleeping because of a very stuffy nose. He’s now asleep, after taking his milk, medication and given nose drops.
Yes, he’s not well AGAIN, just after a week at school. I didn’t bring him to the doc’s but am just giving him medication from the last treatment. Hopefully, he will get better soon. While he has been adjusting well to school again, I think his nose is perhaps sensitive to the aircon there. That, or some kids are sick but are still going being sent to school.
Anyway, I’m so sick of my husband and my MIL asking me why Gavin is falling ill so frequently. Hmpf, I wish I know the answer. Even though they’re just asking a question, but they make me feel so darn guilty from the way they ask. As if I’m responsible for my son’s illness. As if I want my son to fall ill so frequently.
I know my husband doesn’t mean that, but I’m not too sure about my MIL. Yesterday, she came over and apart from quizzing me about the food he eats and the fan we use in his room, she even suggested that I am perhaps too unduly concerned about my son’s health. She thinks that I shouldn’t always bring him to the doc’s whenever he’s ill and that he shouldn’t be taking antibiotics at his age.
I was stumped.
For someone who is a mum almost all her life, what was she thinking? I don’t always bring Gavin to the doc. It depends on the severity of his illness. But how can I not bring him to the doc’s when he’s running a fever and obviously in misery? Isn’t this all part of our motherly instinct? To know when and what we should do for our child in times of need? As for antibiotics, it really depends on the doctor. If he’s having an infection, surely he needs something stronger to help him recover? No?
I wish people around me can be more sensitive to my feelings as a mother instead of passing groundless or unconstructive comments. I know that I am not the best mother around but I am NOT an incompletent mother either. And really, I don’t have to prove to the world what a great or wonderful mother I am. As long as I know I try my best and exercise proper care for my child, please do spare me the drivel.
Hi,
Have been following your blog for quite sometime, and really do enjoy the way your write. I do face the same problem with my son. He was diagnosed as having sinus (inherited fr me) and kept falling sick almost every month. It’s either runny nose, then cough, then sore throat, then fever. Antibiotic is always prescribed when we bring him to the doc. But I do notice that he always perspire cold sweat at night after taking those medicine, and the medication makes him very lethagic. This continues for a two years plus, till he’s around five. After that, I decided I need a long time solution. I started asking around for good doc, but most of them told me there’s no cure for sinus. It’s controlling rather than curing. So, it means nasal drops and spray for him long time. I didn’t want this, so in the end, i have no choice but to seek my mom’s advice and bring him to a chinese physician. The road to recovery is a very slow one. I see very little recovery initially, but after a period of about six months, he was getting much better. Lesser running nose, rosier cheeks, and of course, lesser fever.
You may want to try out chinese physician, coz the medication they prescibed is using natural products, and do no harm to the body.
Comment by Ami — Tue, 4 Jul 2006 @ 9:57 am
SS, I am sorry to hear what u are going thru, early in the morning!
Dont take those groundless remarks personal,k! Cos You are not and we know you are a competent mother, always trying your best and gave the best to Gavin!
So… S M I L E S
and Cheer UP !
Comment by wtpgrr — Tue, 4 Jul 2006 @ 10:01 am
My kids would also usually get sick when they first started going to school. They must be getting different viruses from the other kids. Kids usually get immune as they grow older. So don’t worry. He’ll get stronger as time goes by.
Comment by niceheart — Tue, 4 Jul 2006 @ 10:14 am
I think ur hubby & MIL is also concern abt Gavin falling sick so frequently so dun take it too hard, ok? But my mummy say hor if a kid dun fall sick, he wun grow up. Also not sure wat she say is rite or not, anyway u got to be strong for Gavin, ok?
Comment by Ashes — Tue, 4 Jul 2006 @ 10:22 am
I too think that they are concerned about Gavin and hence those endless questions. Perhaps amongst those questions they posed, they hope to find something that probably ignite those illnesses that possibly, just possibly, you might have overlooked. Look on the bright side. At least you have two more people sharing your woes, it’s better than not to have anyone to share them with.
Comment by domestic rat — Tue, 4 Jul 2006 @ 10:54 am
I feel for you…..
ya, how to answer why my kids are falling ill so often???
They seem to think i enjoy seeing my kids fall ill??? When my kids are ill, who do you think suffer more, of cos us the parents…haiz…..there are just no answers to all these endless questions isn’t it!!!!
Don’t worry, we all share your sentiments….be it woes or joys….part of parenthood (that’s what they call it leh)!!!
Comment by Jan (My lovely Rays) — Tue, 4 Jul 2006 @ 11:55 am
Hey..SS,
Donch take it to heart . .what others might say.. or would say.. or think.
You know what you are doing.. and no one knows your son better than anyone else.
Do not be disheartened…! Hope Gavin gets well real soon.
PS: Children get sick all the time.. trust me.. and it’s no fault of ours..
Comment by Mama Bok — Tue, 4 Jul 2006 @ 12:27 pm
I understand what you’re going through…the same happens when Damien fall sick. My MIL will go on and on asking why is he sick AGAIN?!
Well, it’s definitely not your fault that Gavin is sick, and we all know that you’re doing your best for Gavin!
Hope he recover real fast!
*hugs*
Comment by Eileen — Tue, 4 Jul 2006 @ 2:24 pm
Yup, I can relate how you feel when your MIL questioned you why Gavin is always ill. Cz’ my own Mum does it to me too when Nutty Gal gets ill….the only difference lies with the fact she is my own Mum, so I don’t get offended and I know she is just concerned for her granddaughter.
Sad to say, I wouldn’t react the same if the same question has been asked by my MIL…in fact, I suspect I might get offended if she does.
Yes, I think Chinese medication does help…..in the long run. Anyway, they are all made of herbs and plants so it’s a win-win situation to try…. even if they do not help improve Gavin’s health…. won’t do any harm either. I would say go for it….. might benefit your little boy’s health in the long-run.
If not, try cod liver oil from Nature Farm. I am feeding Nutty 1 teaspoon everyday. Though the taste is horrible, I explained to her it will prevent her from falling ill, so she has been quite cooperative so far. Buy the ones with orange flavour, at least they taste better.
Comment by sunshinensunflower — Tue, 4 Jul 2006 @ 4:48 pm
Ami: Hi, welcome. I’m open to TCM. In fact, I believe in that for the long haul. Do you mind telling me which Chinese physician you bring your son to? I was thinking of bringing him to Yu Ren Shen. The only problem I anticipate is that my son won’t like the Chinese herbal smell. It was only this week that he started to drink the crocodile meat soup which I made him and even that, I have to try to mask the smell with vegetables…A colleague of mine actually gave me a Chinese prescription to help alleviate my son’s condition but because it is bitter, I’m not even trying.
wtpg: Hey thanks for your encouraging words!
niceheart: I guess so. Just that it’s very still very hard to see our kids being sick often…
Ashes: Your mummy very cute lah. But still, I think it’s not good for a kid to be sick too often.
DR: Maybe you’re right. But because I’m already quite vexed, asking me a question like that can switch on my sensitive bulb instantly.
Jan: Yeah right…trials and tribulations of parenthood!
MB: But sometimes I’m ridden with guilt. Like I’ll think maybe it’s cos I didn’t breastfeed him long enough. Sometimes can get paranoid…
Eileen: Thanks! Just wish your Damien and my Gavin will be strong and healthy boys!
SSF: We tend to be sensitive with what our MILs say don’t we? But it can’t be help and sometimes the way they ask is quite strange too…
I’ve been giving him cod liver oil that is bought from Vitakids. It’s quite good. Trying to introduce him to Chinese herbs slowly. From young, I’ve given him small dosage of those mild ones. Now it’s the crocodile meat soup and thank goodness, he’s starting to take it without trouble. It’ll take a while but hopefully, it’ll help.
Comment by sesame — Wed, 5 Jul 2006 @ 7:34 am
Hi,
I bring my son to ‘Zhong He Tang’. The physician is well known for treating child illnesses. It’s situated near kovan mrt. Their number is 62835806. Can call them to find out the exact address. I still bring my son there on sunday, every fornightly, to get their brew to ‘bu’ his body. Maybe may bump into you someday. 8-). Take care, and I hope your son will get well soon.
Comment by Ami — Wed, 5 Jul 2006 @ 8:03 am
Hey thanks Ami! That’s near my mum’s place. In fact, if I’m not wrong, this is the one that my mum frequents to get her herbs. I should have no problem finding the place. Cheers!
Comment by sesame — Wed, 5 Jul 2006 @ 8:12 am
I find that MIL always like to do that.. questioning our ability to care for our own child.. My MIL does that too. Very annoying. Sometimes I just get so upset I tell her, “Why don’t you try training her yourself” (when she said why Zara is still not potty trained) or “Why don’t you try stopping her from having any cold drink” (when she said why I give Zara cold drinks).
Argh!!
Comment by zara's mama — Wed, 5 Jul 2006 @ 10:11 am
I know..SS .. we all do..! we always think.. could we have done this .. that way.. and then they wouldn’t be this way.. ?? i do that too all the time..! but i know.. and am sure.. that we want nothing but the best for our child. So i stop..
and so should you .. 
Comment by Mama Bok — Wed, 5 Jul 2006 @ 10:53 am
I don’t want to end up sounding like your MIL, and get rotten eggs thrown at me.
But to me, the best way for the body to heal is not doing anything. Sometimes, taking too much antibiotics and medicine suppress the body’s ability to heal itself. I don’t give medication and haven’t been for many years. The kids just need to rest when they have a cold, or even fever. If it’s too bad, I use natural medication, like active raw honey, etc. Diet also plays an impt role. *Please don’t throw eggs har.*
Comment by earthember — Wed, 5 Jul 2006 @ 12:23 pm
Hey earthember I help u to catch is ss does, but I believe she wont
I agreeds with eember totally. But most prob asthamatic is a bit tacky so cant do without medication.
And ss, dont feel bad about didnt breast feed Gavin, me neither. I stopped when my girls were two mths old.
Not that I am anti-breast feed but sometimes stituation dont allow, so why be bothered breast feed or not. Formulae milk is very nourishing too! and save all the vexing, except of course, the cost :p
Comment by wtpgrr — Wed, 5 Jul 2006 @ 2:03 pm
Just a gag…
Take a look at the photo…Did u see Gavin’s mind wondering why mummy want to take a photo of me at this stage?
HaHaHa… I was thinking of my hubby wondering why I love to take photos… anything, anytime, any place… my girls’ poo… at the hawker center… the grass… the girls’ limbs… I know he has been enduring with me… he dont quite like those criticium look from passerby :p
Comment by wtpgrr — Wed, 5 Jul 2006 @ 4:25 pm
ZM: I don’t mind if they can tell me something constructive instead of just asking or commenting. Yes, arrgh!
MB: Don’t worry, I don’t beat myself that often. Just sometimes.
EE: I won’t throw eggs at you lah…anyway wtpg will block it for you even if I do…hahaha…
Are u into the homeopathic medication? A friend is also into this. Well, not sure. I think I’ll go with TCM first.
wtpg: Poo you also take? Wow kow! I not so bad lah…my hubby will sometimes suggest what to take, but he gets slightly annoyed if I take longer to snap pix of food though.
Comment by sesame — Wed, 5 Jul 2006 @ 11:18 pm
I agree with SSSF - when my MIL asks a question, I get all irritated. When my mom asks it, I have no problem with it.
Having the same problem as you are - Sara started school recently and has had back-to-back viruses. The latest thing she’s contracted is conjunctivitus. Argh! I’m just working to keep it spreading to the baby. Everyone (including my MIL, thankfully) tells me it’s school and it will be like that till their immunity builds up…
Comment by Hsin — Thu, 6 Jul 2006 @ 9:37 pm
Hsin: Oh dear…hope Sara will recover fast. Conjunctivitus is contagious isn’t it? Must keep the brother away. He’s still too young.
Comment by sesame — Fri, 7 Jul 2006 @ 7:53 am