Someone I barely know at work told me he has about two weeks to decide on a marriage partner. The partner in question is a twenty-something Vietnamese girl whom he has just met this week through a matchmaking agency.

Now I hardly know this guy. He is the IT guy who configured my new notebook. But after conversing with him, it really surprised me that a chap like him needed matchmaking. While Mr IT is not attractive and is definitely no charmer, he’s an average joe who also isn’t repulsive.

- He is not ugly. Not pimpled, not balding and doesn’t have a lorry langa face.
- He is 33, not that old.
- He is not nerdy.
- He has proportionate physical attributes.
- He speaks good English.
- He is well-educated with good knowledge in IT.
- He has a proper job.
- He seems to be of a sound mind.

I can’t comment much on his personality as I scarcely know him. However, through our brief interaction, he comes across as slighty loud and obnoxious. But then again, I’ve met far louder and more obnoxious men than him who still managed to snare themselves local brides.

Overall, I suppose his appeal can be increased with some dressing up and repackaging. It also seems that the Vietnamese girl chose him out of a few other Singapore men. So that goes to show that this guy’s got some redeeming qualities. Well, maybe he can do better with some help in the form of matchmaking, but surely he can still be matchmade with local girls?

Indeed Mr IT has tried SDU but to no avail. “No local girls will like me,” he said. He mentioned something about the local girls being difficult to please, blah blah. The standard stereotyping shite. So why Vietnamese girls I asked him. “More submissive” was his spontaneous answer. Aha! So Mr IT is also Mr Chauvinist. ‘’Local girls very difficult to manage lah,” he said. MANAGE??? Yesh, he actually used that word and laughed it off when I rolled my eyes at him.

Then it became clear to me. This guy has no balls to take on our local girls. He clearly has a big ego and is not interested in having a wife with a mind of her own. Perhaps he might have had some failed relationships with local girls in the past. So he’s now choosing the easier way out to buy himself a bride who is submissive, deferential, and looks good too. Never mind he needs to make a hasty decision in two weeks’ time to marry a stranger. Never mind there’s no love or chemistry. Never mind he would have to be $7000 poorer by that decision. I suppose all that matters is that the Vietnamese bride-to-be can stroke his ego the right way and make him happy?

So what really is about men who complained that our Singapore girls are too materialistic and calculative? I’m sure the stories about those who need to be desperately married but have no takers are true. But that’s only half of the picture. On the other hand, there are men like Mr IT, who are just intimidated by our self-assured local girls. All they want are pretty, subservient, docile women who will please them and hopefully also worship them. Perhaps these men want to consider a cross between a barbie doll who can copulate and a doormat?

Of course Mr IT can make his choices anyway he likes. It’s after all his life. But men like him should just stop lambasting our local girls for setting their standards too high and not get real about their own expectations.