I’ve a confession to make. I’ve been fiddling and twiddling for weeks now. Fiddling with my blog and twiddling with my thumb. In short, “jou bo”.

This is a slow month in terms of work, and frankly, I don’t feel like working. I’ve been procrastinating on a few new projects and it probably won’t be long before I wake up panicking in the middle of the night.

We’ve had some good news in our household this week. News that we’ve been waiting for awhile. However, even that didn’t make me jump with joy. In fact, it create some new insecurities for me. Maybe I’m just too worrisome and have been weighed down by some setbacks.

First, work. My colleague just broke some unpleasant news to me last week. News that I kind of expected, but nonetheless annoyed. Apparently, she was told that she would be shelved for a couple of months and some of us might be too. So that would mean no income for some months. And what’s distressing is that the management is hush hush about everything. All I can say is that we part-timers always get marginalised. What to do? It’s after all my choice to work part-time. So I’ve to learn to live with the uncertainties and sometimes, the consequences. As in everything else, there are two sides to a coin. What’s fortunate is that I’ve pre-empted this and have been working on other opportunities.

Then, there are relationship problems. Such as with MIL and some bozo I work with. Buzzing irritation that I can’t get rid of totally, unfortunately. So again, I’ve to learn to deal with the situation.

I guess I’m just depressed but no, it’s not mid life crisis. That’s a has-been for me. So now, it’s probably PMS. Or is this the onset of MENOPAUSE? But I’m not yet 40 leh…